The Joy of Giving (Now vs. Later)

Photo by Maximalfocus on Unsplash

I don't know if this happens in other families, but in our family (and extended family), if by chance you buy that extra gift or two for someone even though you already have a gift for them, we often write 'From: Santa' or 'From: Sky' (one of our dogs). 

After all, the gift is given for the sake of giving itself, not to receive credit or a thank you. It's given to experience the joy the gift brings, and what an experience it is! How cool is it that giving creates joy in both the recipient and the giver?

Giving via inheritance…

Giving has been a focus of ours recently, from tax-efficient giving strategies and the various giving-related tax items changing due to The One Big Beautiful Bill Act passing. Click on those links to view my recent blog posts on those topics if you're interested. 

But another recent theme for us, due to several clients experiencing this, has been people receiving inheritances from a parent (or parents) passing away. And setting aside the emotional turmoil and mourning that is inevitable and so hard with such circumstances, there is also quite a lot of logistical upheaval that comes from handling the financial and legal aspects of it all. From legally accessing the inheritance, to transferring the money or assets into their name, to deciding what to do with such assets, it can all be so overwhelming and confusing. Yuck.

Sometimes, the money or assets can be really beneficial to those to whom it is left. Perhaps it provides a way to buy a house, to start a business, to fund college, to pay off debts, etc. 

But sometimes, heirs can feel confused about what to do with money or assets from an inheritance, often feeling that it needs to be used to honor a legacy somehow or gifted to charities that their parents would have supported. The money can therefore sometimes not produce the joy and relief that it could, because there is so much emotion tied to the money. It can sometimes become almost a burden. Which, me thinks, is probably the opposite of what the intent was from the giver. 

The sad truth is that even if someone gives throughout their lifetime, the majority of their giving usually occurs upon their death.

Let that sink in a bit. 

Unfortunately, gifts given at death can limit the joy on both sides. The recipient may struggle with it due to the emotional and logistical reasons listed above. And it can also mean the giver was entirely deprived of the joy of the gift, as they were not there to experience it. 

…vs. giving during your lifetime

Pardon the somewhat depressing nature of this topic, but I bring it up during this season of the year when giving (and time with loved ones) is already so present in our minds. How intensely memorable these times of giving and receiving with our loved ones are. The joy on each of my family members' faces on Christmas morning is fresh in my mind currently. Who knew Lego and homemade inside joke t-shirts could be so momentous? 

My encouragement to all of us is to ponder how we can pursue experiencing the joy of giving today and during our remaining time on earth, perhaps in addition or instead of leaving it for after we are gone. 

One of the cool things about financial planning is that I get to witness (and in a small way be a part of) the joy my clients experience from giving, whether because they are the ones giving or receiving. 

Some families go on trips together instead of buying presents. It could be the older generation picking up the tab, blessing their younger, still-getting-established family members. Sometimes it's the other way around and the well-established kids can provide their aging parents with a trip that was maybe never an option for them. 

Perhaps it's someone providing the funds for a jet ski that everyone then joyfully joins in on the fun. 

Perhaps it's using some inheritance money on a swimming pool or bigger house where family members can come spend time with the older generation in comfort and pleasure. 

Perhaps it's providing a down payment on a house in the same neighborhood, where grandkids can freely wander next door to the grandparents. 

Really, the possibilities are endless. Whatever it may be, the memory dividends and deposits of joy are worth every penny, especially when we get to experience the gift. 

Don't get me wrong, when it comes to budgeting and planning, we need to prioritize funding our long-term health and finances for whatever our needs (and wants) may be in the future through the end of our lives (as best we can predict such things). Furthermore, not everyone has family or close friends to spend their hard-earned money on, nor is it going to be a good fit for everyone to give in these ways we are talking about today. 

But for those who it does apply to, I simply want to challenge us all to be thinking of ways we can be investing in experiencing the joy of giving while we can still enjoy it. 

Whether this topic strikes a chord with you or not, my hope is that you all have a wonderfully joyous, givingful holiday season.